Working Woman Gives Her Husband a Wake-up Call After Refusing to Cook Dinner Every Night, Claiming She's Just as Tired as Him After Working a Full Day

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    He works in IT, and I work in marketing. Despite us having similar work hours, I've somehow ended up being the one who cooks dinner every single night. At first, I didn't mind because I enjoy cooking, but over time, it's become
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    AITAH for telling my husband I won't cook dinner every night because I also work full-time?
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    I (30F) have been married to my husband, Tom (32M), for 4 years. We both work full-time jobs- he works in IT, and I work in marketing. Despite us
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    having similar work hours, I've somehow ended up being the one who cooks dinner every single night. At first, I didn't mind because I enjoy cooking,
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    but over time, it's become exhausting. Some days, I come home after a long day and just want to relax. Meanwhile, Tom comes home, sits on the couch, and waits for
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    dinner to be served. He never offers to help with cooking or cleaning up afterward. Last night, I told Tom that I'm done being the only
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    responsible for cooking dinner. I suggested that we split the responsibility- either he cooks a few nights a week, we take turns, or we order takeout
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    sometimes. Tom got defensive and said it's "not a big deal" since I'm "better at cooking anyway" and that it's something I've always done. He also said he's too tired after work
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    and doesn't see why this needs to change. I got frustrated and told him it's unfair to expect me to do everything when we both work. Now he's upset,
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    saying I'm overreacting and making a big deal out of something small. He even told a couple of his friends, who are siding with him, saying "it's just dinner."
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    So, AITAH for telling my husband I won't cook dinner every night because I also work full-time?
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    Annual-Abies-2034 NTA. If it's a small deal and it's just dinner, he can do it himself or order takeout.
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    Medievalqweer My petty a would just cook for myself lol. Caroline Turpentine Nah I'd come home with takeout just for me.
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    ElsaAfterDark NTA. Sharing chores is fair since you both work full time. It's not 'just dinner' when it adds to your workload.
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    Usual-Canary-7764 I am.petty. what you wrote is perfectly logical and should be the way but Tom has his back up so in OP's place I would: stop cooking dinner for the next 4 weeks. When Tom's asks...I will reply: "It's no big deal so I am not sure
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    why your are overreacting over nothing". Tom can either get his ain gear and go cook or not it's his issue. Not OPs. NTA. And anyone siding with Tom can have him. Literally. And cook for him everyday.
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    Salt-Finding9193 'He never offers to clean up afterwards' you have got to be kidding me. If he wants dinner he has to do the clean up. What are you doing with this big baby? Tell him to get off his lazy a and cook and clean 3-4 days a week or it's over.
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    Darkhead3380 NTA. If you two work the same hours, the chores should be split 50/50. Including the responsibility(!). Either he makes up for your cooking time in other activities (cleaning, laundry, grocery
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    shopping,...) or he's responsible for half of the meals. If he refuses to do his duties, just don't cook for him. Or leave the AH immediately. It's not the 50s any more.
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    SophiaGreennn You are not the household chef. It is perfectly reasonable to expect a shared responsibility for cooking dinner.

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